How I tried to decode the Tantrum Challenge?

How I tried to decode the Tantrum Challenge?

A shout here, a scream and the next thing I see are a string of soft toys being hurled at me. I escape a few and then the last one hits right on my back! Whoa, that did hurt my neck a bit!

Wondering what this is all about?

An old experience I would like to relate to. Before that, I would like to give you a picture of my family. We have a huge family. I mean my dad had 7 brothers. These uncles got married and each one has their own sweet family. My dad was the eldest and I also happened among the eldest of the cousins.

I have one elder brother and one elder sister and by the time I was 12 years old, they went off to study in graduation college. At that time, I guess it was the baby season and I had a lot of cousins aged between 2-5 years old.

All our moms had a tradition- to relax once in a month.

Freak out, Moms!

Once in a month, the wives of all the 8 men planned an outing. It could be to the park or a club or whatever. All they did is chat away, eat all sorts of goodies, enjoy at the spas and have a gala time!

Of course, they deserve it after looking after naughty and energetic kids like us.

Babysitting Time!

Now, when they plan to freak out – it is our duty as older children to look after the smaller ones. ‘Our’ means me and my cousin sister who was about 10 years of age at that time. Well, in the beginning- we enjoyed it- because they were cute, young and after all, they were our cousins.

But later on, I frankly did not enjoy any bit! These kids may be tiny, but they could be monstrous once the ‘Tantrum Bug’ strikes them.

Calming the Tantrum

Sure, that is never easy, but I as a person – tries to find solutions for any problem that keeps hitting my head. In this case, if I never found a solution, more soft toys would be hurled at me. Sometime, it could be pens, and books...you never know what their tiny hands reach out for.

Jeez, I tell you – there were so many times I felt like bashing all these tiny tots and packing them into a room. But yeah, that cannot be done! Hey, relax, these are only mean thoughts out of frustration and exasperation. Nothin more!

The moment these babies fall asleep- I am happy again and love them too!

Now, to calm their tantrum was not easy at all. I tried shouting, making faces, singing songs, dancing, watching TV, telling and enacting stories and what not!

If I and my cousin played Tom and Jerry one day, the next day, we would probably be the guys from Sesame Street, or maybe just dance to ‘Hakuna Matata’. The choices were so many, but our energy levels drained by the end of the day.

The Technique that Worked!

Just before I begin, I am dealing with tantrums and nothing more. But if you have a child who is going through a meltdown- then the case is a bit more crucial and the technique I state- may not help.

Don’t worry, I will keep you posted on that too- because, over the years, I had to deal a pair of twins who were going through meltdowns. So, will share that too!

What you must understand about tantrums?

For tantrum freaks or rather children- their basic problem is that they need attention, love, response and to top it all- everything should reflect happiness and positivism.

Children by birth have small urges like they may like a particular toy or color at a specific moment. If this is not paid attention to, they burst off.

What you see are their grief and uncontrolled anger. This will keep surging up and it quite difficult to bring it under control. The only way it subsides is:

• When the child cries and screams for a long time and they tire out eventually.
• If you are firm, yet kind with the child- they will come under your control slowly.
• Next is the important advice I have for you- Never prolong and leave the child to cry, get stressed out, and make a scene out there. The earlier you intervene, the child will be under your control!
• I know I had mentioned in the first point that it will subside if left alone. That is true, but your baby will be exhausted. To top it, they are still hurt!
• Children could get moody if they are unwell, have a fever or a stomach upset. Toddlers generally would not know how to express the problem and they express their discomfort and emotions by way of tantrums.
• Communicate with them. Talk to them gently but firmly. Look into their eye. Be sincere and ask what they need. Give them respect – they need it. Trust me.
• Watch over their meal times. Hunger could strike badly and yes, babies express it in the form of yells, cries, tantrums and kicks and what not!
• If it is something, you cannot give at the moment- say a firm ‘No’, but not harshly or loudly. Let them know that you feel that they are good children and there is no need to make a tantrum.

At a Public Place?

Kids are bound to blow up and become emotional at places where a lot of public lingers. It could be in malls and hypermarkets.

So what do you do?

I had an embarrassing experience like this when my cousin sister wanted a doll at the Mall. It was a huge one, but her mom has instructed me - ‘No Buying’!!

I was in a complete fix. This tiny tot, first shouted, then lay on the floor, kicking and pushing all small toys on the lower shelves. Seriously, I was numb- didn’t have a clue what to do!

Then all I did was that I held her hand firmly. I talked and convinced her that I will buy it, but not now- as I didn’t have money. I suggested, ‘Why don’t we just look at which one is the best?’

She eyed me, got up and pointed at a beautiful doll. I started commenting on it and made her think whether that was good or something else was. Like that, we spent about 15 minutes and last she was tired.

She asked me if we could go home and that she did not want any doll now.

Wow, my wish is granted and she is at peace! But, keep in mind guys, 

Patience is the secret ingredient to put away those tantrums.

Hope you had a good time reading and you too could share your tantrum experiences also.